Does anyone else hate unpacking?

Getting ready for a trip is stressful. Not to mention when that trip is post-finals and post-big-work-messes and post-end-of-semester-yahooligans.

Plus, I'm like my Mom. I like things clean. And for some reason, when I am about to leave for a trip I want everything pristine. I mean, cleaner than I would ever have it if I were staying here. Weird? I know.

But last time I had a pre-trip clean obsession, it worked in my favor. We returned from Thanksgiving break thinking "WOW it feels good to be home, and wow does our home look good". And we were really grateful that we had worked to hard to clean.

That said, here's what my to-do list looks like for today/tomorrow morning:

-Pack. I love packing. But I hate unpacking. Problems.
- Exercise. Today we're running stairs so if I never see you again...
- Empty the fridge of all things that will rot
- Scrub the fridge out
- Finish making Christmas gifts (just call me the ULTIMATE procrastinator)
- Wrap Christmas gifts
- Mop kitchen floor real good
- Wipe down the walls (this sounds really strange, I'm not even sure why I put it up. But that's me, bebe).
- Take down Christmas tree
- Date night!
- Tidy up bathroom
- Dust livingroom
- Index (for our calling)
- Write missionaries: Hermana Franklin and Elder Andersen

And a whole lot more. But I realized after that last one that this is probably going to be the lamest post you've ever read and you probably never ever want to hear about my to-do list again. Sorry, guys.

This Family Is Forever

Plus, we're a pretty good looking bunch. And despite the image of crying children, we really do have a whale of a time when we're together...

Whatever that means.

I sure love my family.

Dreams

I've realized lately that maybe there's something wrong with me. You know how people have things that they're just super passionate about and would sacrifice a lot of things to be/do/have/see? Well...I'm struggling to find that thing. My niche. My life goal. My dream, if you will.

I used to be involved in photography. But I think before I even realized it, my sub conscious screamed "DON'T! YOU MIGHT NOT BE GOOD!" So I stopped.

I used to be on a swim team. But again, before I realized why, I found myself not wanting to join a team again, despite my deep love of swimming, because others were better than I was.

I used to be a music major. Now there are many reasons why I quit that program, but I think it took it's toll. Music is one of my refuges in life, but I haven't really put myself out there to perform or sing very much. Want to know why? Because I was told too much in my year as a music major that my voice was ugly, or that I did things wrong.

I never learned to cook because I was scared of burning, overcooking, undercooking, not setting the table right, or making a mess.

So without knowing it, I've built up this paralyzing fear of messing up. Not in everything, mind you. I take risks in some areas, and it seems to be okay for the most part. But in a lot of things, I am just too afraid to try. I didn't even know I had this sickening problem until this last year where I've fallen in love with someone who respects me and thinks the world of me. Tom doesn't love me less if I don't sing right or if I write dramatically or if I don't win the race.

In fact, he's encouraging me to try more, be bold and brave. Pursue that shelled up dream that may crash and burn, and if it does so what?!

Basically, I'm married to the best man, and I'm so lucky to have him. He makes me want to be better and try harder, and not just in the things I'm good at. Isn't that the greatest?

So this is my message of the day to you: be brave! Be courageous and confident. It's a process, we're all learning, so be kind to each other. We can do hard things.

4 months, and other appropriate mushiness

Tomorrow, Tom and I will have been married for 4 months. We both feel like it's been way longer, like we've always been married. It just feels so natural to be together, like we've always been together. And can I just say that married life is the best. If you ask Tom he'll always joke how dumb it was being engaged. Yes it was fun, but you've already made that commitment to be with them forever, it just hasn't been quite solidified yet. Anyways, the point is that we both really prefer being married to being single, dating, or being engaged.

And wow, 4 months! Time sure flies. We've been through a lot, and if it's any indication of how our future will be, boy am I in for a fun, beautiful, amazing ride!

In 4 months we've celebrated holidays together.

He has forgiven me at least 4 times. More like 4 a day.

We have stopped whatever we're doing to say "we are so weird". Again, this happens about 4 times a day.

I've cooked at least 4 successful meals and found a Tom fave: chicken spaghetti.

We've gone on way more than 4 super fun and cheap dates that are definitely in my top favorites.

We've made chocolate chip pancakes many times 4 times.

We've gone through 4 TV's. Don't worry, we finally have a functioning TV for those rare occasions when we sit to watch a movie.

I've had 4 'mid life crises' where I decide to change my major and everything else with it.

4 times my patient husband has brought me back down and helped me see the big picture, so I didn't change my major again.

We've said I love you at least 4 times a day. More like 56 but that's not a '4' number so...

We've established 4 goals for our life (at least) that we are devoted to and working towards with all that we do.

We've worked out together together 4 times a week on our best week.

Marrying you was the best choice I've ever made, and I am grateful to Heavenly Father every day for you as the greatest blessing I'll ever receive.

*insert loud and long cat call*
Do you see those muscles?

Don't get me started on the eyes.

Thanks to Cami for capturing our first "family photo"!

I love you forever, hunky babe.

What else do you do in your sweats?

No, that post about Thanksgiving never came, and it probably won't happen, so I apologize to my small group of readers, and hope you'll forgive me.

This is a post-workout post. We just finished a cycling class that kicked my butt I'm every way except literally, and now I'm siding getting off my bum to do dishes and make the bed. (The one we'll be getting back into in a couple of hours, yes that bed.)

I don't have much to say, but things are good. Sometimes I look around at my apartment, my life, and feel overwhelmingly blessed. I have so much work to do and so many ways to improve, and still Heavenly Father sees fit to bless me with oh so much. I just don't understand it! I have my best friend as my eternal companion, the one who forgives and serves and loves me for reasons I'll never know.

We're entering finals week, so life is stressful at the Cook house. Tyson is coming on Tuesday, as our first house guest! Christmas is so close we can almost taste it! I know Tom will ask me to read this post to him so I can't spill the beans on what the Mr will be receiving, but I think it will be a very good Christmas for both of us.

And now, pictures.

Ward Christmas party!

At the BYU I Christmas concert with Nathan Pachenco. It was such a good concert and a great night! Even if my blow dryer did poop out on me right before, we still made it. #survivors

I donated plasma for the first time this week and it wasn't awful! Just trying to bring in that dough where we can..

I made these letters out of cereal boxes! I'm anxious to get fabric mod podged on them and hang them up. This, my friends, is being resourceful.

We absolutely love our Christmas tree! More on the evolution of the tree later.

Back to reality, no thank you.

We had SUCH a great time in Texas for the Thanksgiving break. Being a very large family, it's chaotic, and loud, and there is always a lot going on. And I love it. Of course there are challenges, but as soon as you're away from all of it, you just miss it. As we drove away, Jeff said "I already miss Texas". Ironically, we still had 11 hours left to drive through just Texas, but I knew exactly what he meant. I already miss my family so much and can't wait to be with them all again.

Just as with any vacation, it was very hard to come back to reality. Especially after a week long vacation, and a super long drive there and back which kind of screwed up our sleeping schedule. Tom was sick, and when the alarm went off on Monday morning, I just couldn't do it. Mostly laziness, and a lot of being tired, but we'll just ignore my bad decision making here. I worked from home which was really nice, and allowed me to take care of Tom and get more rest myself.

So that was weird, that Monday of working from home. Thus began one of the weirdest weeks!

Tuesday was a fairly normal day, until the evening when we were forced to notice our biggest trial that we had been subconsciously ignoring. I guess every newly married couple goes through financial struggles, right? Well now is our time, for real. Oh boy. But, in a way this trial was the answer to a really dumb prayer of mine. Anyways, enough woe is me. Tuesday night was really hard, but we are doing great!

Wednesday I woke up early to finish making cookies for a work thing. Except that they weren't even cookies, and I couldn't get the chocolate to melt right and they looked like little turd balls. Please excuse the visual. They were peanut butter balls dipped in chocolate, and boy was it frustrating. Then, as Tom's alarm went off, the power shut off from Firth to Rexburg. For those of you a little behind on your Southeast Idaho geography, that's quite a space - about 50 minutes driving time, and a lot of people were affected. I went to work to make sure nobody else was there, which was super scary. But don't worry, I had a flashlight (that's what we call acting on a prompting) to help me navigate the abandoned halls.

Miracle of miracles, all of Tom's classes were cancelled one by one. (Just a note, BYU-Idaho has never in the history of their existence from the time they were Bannock Stake Academy in 1888, have they ever cancelled class/work a whole day. They will cancel classes one at a time and then resume normal schedules when the power is on or whatever. History lesson over.) Which meant that my poor sick husband got to stay home and rest, which he desperately needed. Plus, who wants to go outside when it's -9 degrees? Not I, said the cow. We took a nap, then when the power came back on I went to work. A couple hours later I came home, we watched Forever Strong as part of one of Tom's assignments, and we did a lot of productive things. It was a weird, but really good day.

And today, well today hasn't been weird. It's just been a good day.

Even if it was still in the negatives when I walked to work. What's the real difference between -9 and -6 anyway? I mean, is there a greater evil here? I'm rambling.

Happiest of birthdays to sweet Madison Lynn Weston, who is 3 years old today! Madi is the sweetest little girl ever, and I loved soaking in her sweet spirit over Thanksgiving. We love you, Madi cakes!

So anyways, I guess that all this just means that I'm bored while I watch Tom practice his routine for teaching in class tomorrow, and I'm avoiding doing the dishes. What about you, anyone else having Thanksgiving hangover? Thank goodness it's almost the weekend.

Oh and I'm donating plasma tomorrow for the first time, so, there's that. Gotta rake in that money somehow.

Okay I'll stop now before this rambling gets out of hand (no comments about how that already happened on paragraph 11).