I've realized lately that maybe there's something wrong with me. You know how people have things that they're just super passionate about and would sacrifice a lot of things to be/do/have/see? Well...I'm struggling to find that thing. My niche. My life goal. My dream, if you will.
I used to be involved in photography. But I think before I even realized it, my sub conscious screamed "DON'T! YOU MIGHT NOT BE GOOD!" So I stopped.
I used to be on a swim team. But again, before I realized why, I found myself not wanting to join a team again, despite my deep love of swimming, because others were better than I was.
I used to be a music major. Now there are many reasons why I quit that program, but I think it took it's toll. Music is one of my refuges in life, but I haven't really put myself out there to perform or sing very much. Want to know why? Because I was told too much in my year as a music major that my voice was ugly, or that I did things wrong.
I never learned to cook because I was scared of burning, overcooking, undercooking, not setting the table right, or making a mess.
So without knowing it, I've built up this paralyzing fear of messing up. Not in everything, mind you. I take risks in some areas, and it seems to be okay for the most part. But in a lot of things, I am just too afraid to try. I didn't even know I had this sickening problem until this last year where I've fallen in love with someone who respects me and thinks the world of me. Tom doesn't love me less if I don't sing right or if I write dramatically or if I don't win the race.
In fact, he's encouraging me to try more, be bold and brave. Pursue that shelled up dream that may crash and burn, and if it does so what?!
Basically, I'm married to the best man, and I'm so lucky to have him. He makes me want to be better and try harder, and not just in the things I'm good at. Isn't that the greatest?
So this is my message of the day to you: be brave! Be courageous and confident. It's a process, we're all learning, so be kind to each other. We can do hard things.
i love this. that's why i never did any sports growing up. i was so afraid i would never be as good as the other kids. thanks for the encouragement!
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I love this Laura! Ever since I met you, your words have always inspired me! Lately, my motto has actually been that very same line, "we can do hard things". I want to be the best wife, nurse, and some day mother as possible and sometimes I feel like the world is telling me I can't do it all. But then I remind myself that with the Lord, we can and we shall do hard things!
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